Is it Better to get a Job Before you get Engaged?
Dear Pharmacy Doctor
I am about 3 months away from pharmacy school graduation. I’m so excited! What is even more exciting is that I found out my boyfriend had asked permission from my parents to marry me. My excitement blew over as I struggle to find a job. My options were limited. Now, I have a great opportunity to interview for a hospital position in another state. My boyfriend cannot move and he is upset that I’m even considering it. My parents are taking the 5th amendment on this one. I have no idea what to do. Since you are female pharmacist, I figured that you had some thoughts. What do you think, job or engagement?
Dear New Pharmacy Graduate
It’s a quandary that when women graduate, they get engaged as well. Haven’t you seen Legally Blonde? First of all, let me congratulate you on your success. Graduating from pharmacy school is a milestone in your life. Savor the moment; engagement is another milestone that should have its own moment, one that doesn’t conflict with other milestones like getting your first job.
Naturally, as an engaged or married couple, you are expected to respect your mate’s wishes. You cannot easily interview for any position in any city or any state. In some cases, your mate may demand that you only work Monday through Friday with no weekends. Unfortunately, job location and hours are not up to you. Thus, your stress on finding your first job increases exponentially.
I am not a marriage counselor or claim to “know it all”. However, I witnessed many of my pharmacy interns ecstatic about their engagement one minute and next, overly stressed about the upcoming pharmacy board exam. After coming home from a day of studying, the couples would fight about jobs and wedding plans. The non-engaged interns worry about the exam but not to the same degree as others.
I will suggest that you avoid getting engaged or married until you have found a job that suits you. Study diligently for the board exam. Send out resumes to companies. If you are willing to relocate, this is the best time to do so. Job opportunities may not be plentiful where you reside but there is a high demand in other parts of the state and country. Brush up on your interview skills (see Pharmacy Jobs Interview Guide for New Graduates). Don’t be discouraged if you don’t receive job offers immediately. Thank the interviewer with a follow-up thank you card or phone call. If possible, ask the interview why you didn’t get the job. Their critique will help you land a job in your future interviews.
As far as the relationship goes, discuss your plans with your boyfriend. Tell him how important it is for you to find the right job. If you see him as a future spouse, let him know. You should be very transparent. He may be willing to wait for you to settle down with a job since he knows that the relationship is secure.
About the Author
Dr. Karine Wong has a 10 year history of working in hospital management and 2 years as a hospital pharmacist and outpatient pharmacist. She recently published a children's book called Don't Sit On Her.
Comment on this article or post an article by joining the RxEconsult community.
Please Share on Your Social Networks